Blog 2020

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!
Hope everyone had great and positive holidays and if not I hope some positive days are coming. I was abstinent for the first time during the holidays. A unique experience. As one of my friends says “it’s easier to stay abstinent than to get abstinent”.  She’s very right about that. I have more abstinence now than I’ve ever had through the grace of my higher power. I never thought I could do it but I have been going to meetings, reading, meditating and praying and eventually it all fell into place. I also call my sponsor at least once a week or when I think I’m going to be in a sticky situation. Anyway, just feeling really grateful right now. Some words of wisdom from Atiya:

 

Sun, Dec 29, 2019 12:58 pm
Atiya Mosley (myserenitymypeace@hotmail.com)To:you (Bcc) Details
Having had a(nother) spiritual awakening . . .

     -Step Twelve, paraphrased

On Monday after a night of insomnia (preceded by an emotional conflict with my partner), I had a spiritual experience.

After some of my spiritual practices that morning (meditation, calling into a telephone meeting and two recovery phone calls), I had a spiritual awareness:  Could I simply choose to believe in God?  Is belief simply a choice?  

After my cardio workout, I went to do my sit-ups and an old, familiar song (Whatta Man by Salt ’N’ Pepa) came streaming through while I was still on the telephone meeting (something which had not been technologically possible in the past): “OK!”  I said to a higher power.  “Yes I believe!”   I then (while simultaneously listening to the telephone meeting and this song about a good man) had the awareness of my part in the conflict with my partner: “I am the one who is expecting perfection and not accepting.  I need to reflect the mirror back on me.”  I also had the awareness that perhaps I could go without in person meetings for the week, while out of town, to accommodate the schedules of others.  “Yes I can trust!

I left the gym and drove home, choosing to sit with the spiritual awareness (turning off the radio; not making a telephone call).  Being with it. Noticing the silence.  Recognizing it.  Hearing inside: The stillness is within.  Continuing to be aware and awake spiritually (though barely physically, I chuckled to myself, with only 3 hours of sleep).  Love, lightness & laughter are the answer!

Let’s see where this goes. Trusting more will be revealed (it always is).  Thanks for serving as loving witnesses.

Atiya M.

Durham-Raleigh, NC

919-302-1030 (no text messages please)

myserenitymypeace@hotmail.com